


The Flash Takes a Meeting With an Intellectual Property Attorney

by magicant2000



Category: The Flash - All Media Types
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-10-03 23:08:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20461028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/magicant2000/pseuds/magicant2000
Summary: The Flash decides to take a stand and stop bootleg products with his picture on them. A dialogue ensues.





	The Flash Takes a Meeting With an Intellectual Property Attorney

“Look,” The Flash said, “I don’t want to make any money, I just want to get rid of some of the products that are less… positive.” Of all the abilities The Flash had, sitting still was not one of them and it was never more apparent than right now.

“That’s the thing about intellectual property rights, though,” the attorney said. “You can’t just enforce it on products that you don’t like. You have to enforce it on everyone who doesn’t have the proper rights to produce it. To hold up in court, you need to have a solid lock on your trademarks across the board.” 

“So to get rid of this ‘Speedster’ thing, I also have to stop charities from using my image? And children’s hospitals that have my picture painted on the walls? They’re doing important work and I’m happy to be able to help where I can.”

“Unfortunately you’ve got over a decade of history where you didn’t enforce any kind of legal rights on products that had your name and image on them. Now because a new Flash-based marital aid is topping the chart of adult novelties, you want to get into selective enforcement. That’s not an easy thing.”

“What alternatives do I have? I’m getting tired of the Rogues making double entendres about dildos while they’re trying to kill me.”

“Well, let’s back up a bit. When you became a superhero, did you register the name Flash?”

“What? No. What do you mean register?” 

“File any kind of trademark registration that you had claims to the name and any associated branding.”

“Mmmm. I just started using the name because I had the same powers as the first Flash."

“The first Flash? You mean you weren’t the one who originally used the name?”

“No. There was my friend, Jay… I mean, the original Flash. He was around a few decades ago. You don’t know that?”

“History’s not my thing. So, you just started using someone else’s brand name. If he didn’t have any prior claim or challenge it, that’s okay, but it’s kind of an unethical practice. How about the rest of your image – the colors, the suit?”

“Oh, that’s all mine. His was very different. Except for the lightning bolt, I guess. And the wings on my ears that are kind of like the ones on his helmet.”

“Wings. Mmmm hmm.”

“Oh, and mine shrinks up into my ring ... My suit, I mean.”

“It what?”

“Shrinks up to fit into my ring, then comes out when I press a button.”

“Your whole suit fits into a ring? Doesn’t it get wrinkly?”

“Well, it’s a special fabric I developed. And the wrinkles… well, it’s sort of tight so they just kind of go away.”

“And yet, you’re having trouble that this sex toy is named after you.”

“What?”

“Never mind. So, usually your intellectual property rights would include trademarks that include your color scheme and costume design, anything uniquely identifiable. Do you know the PMS codes of your suit?”

“The what?”

“We’ll figure it out. Just give us some fabric swatches. You’ll eventually have to incorporate some form of usage intention and registered categories. Just because you want to use The Flash as your name doesn’t mean you can stop someone from selling “Flash Laundry Detergent” if it’s not using any of your brand identity.”

“Brand identity?”

“Like the entirety of your image. If someone created Flash Laundry Detergent but the packaging was blue and white and it didn’t use your picture, then you wouldn’t have any claim over that. Unless you already had a Flash Laundry Detergent that did include your imagery.”

“I don’t understand.”

“In part, it’s about consumer confusion. If a consumer could reasonably believe that a product was licensed or endorsed by you, then it’s infringing on your trademarks. Or if it’s a competing product and using the same name as something you already produce. Those can both be shown to create consumer confusion with your trademarks. But if it’s just some every day product using a word that you decided to start calling yourself, well, you can’t really own the rights to that.”

“To me, this is ALL pretty confusing.”

“There’s a lot more to it, I’m kind of simplifying it here. Superhero intellectual property law is constantly changing because you and your buddies went years without focusing on it. It doesn’t mean we don’t have alternatives, but they’re going to be tough to work through since so much time has passed without any kind of enforcement. Any lawsuit will be an uphill climb because…”

“Wait, lawsuit?”

“That’s what it would need to come to. We can start sending cease and desist letters around to everyone using your name and photos, and that’s a first step. But you have to have teeth behind it for it to hold up. Do you have any kind of existing licensing agreements?"

“No, nothing like that. I just never paid any attention to it.”

“Companies have been making t-shirts and toys with your picture on them for a decade and you never once thought ‘hey these guys are making money off me and I’m not seeing a dime.’”

“I’m not doing this for money. I have a job for that. Someone once said ‘with great power comes…’”

“Yeah, yeah. I get it. But you see, Flash, you’ve let corporations and bootleggers create a market. They filled the vacuum that you didn’t. I get the altruistic thing, I really do. I mean, every year my wife and I give money to PawPaw Palace to help rescue animals and we’ve adopted three yorkies from them already. But that’s just it. You set up a licensing deal and then you can decide where that money goes. Why let some rando retailer take 100% of the profits from stuff based on your work and your image? If you don’t want that money, you could direct it toward the charity of your choice.”

“I never thought about that. I just wanted to stop criminals. When I got started, it was just petty thieves and bank robbers. The global fame thing took me by surprise. I never expected I’d be stopping aliens and megalomaniacs from destroying the planet.”

“Lots of people are destroying the planet, my friend. Including the ones slapping your name on their plastic water bottles.”

“Shit. So what do I do?”

“Well, we can set you up and map out a long-term business plan. Figure out the best licensing strategy, set up an LLC, kick off the legal side of things to do some damage control, then get more aggressive after that. I can work up a contract for you in about a week.”

“Uh, can I sign a contract as The Flash?”

“Is The Flash a person? With legal standing and identity? Of course not. We have a saying here. ‘Corporations are people, but superheroes are just fiction.’ You need a corporate entity to get started. That’s not really my specialty, but I can give you a referral.”

“That’s a lot to think about. I need some time to digest it all.”

“Take your time. Just keep in mind those adoring fans and what they might be doing in their bedrooms every day you wait.”


End file.
